This is a post I made on Facebook a year ago. The words are still relative, so I wanted to post a similar version to my blog.
I’ve wanted to write a post for a while, about dealing with what life throws at us. It’s rather lengthy; I apologize, but I feel called to pour out what is in my heart. No more procrastinating, so here goes.
Many people who know me also know a curve came my way 14 years ago. My friends and family walk with me through the trials because of the spinal cord injury and the subsequent 7 or 8 surgeries that followed (13 total in my life so far). I am forever grateful for all the support, love, and compassion they continue to show me through the years. My family and friends became my hands and legs for me.
I am a proud believer in Christ Jesus and know my Father in heaven carries me through the struggles. Without Him, my life would be much different. God blessed me with a “happy-go-lucky” personality as a child. He brought me to the perfect mate who could handle the struggles in our lives because God and God alone knew what I would face in my future life. He gave me loving children who honor, respect, and continue to give so much of themselves to help me. As a sinner, I know I don’t deserve this but as a child of God, I know that my Father loves and takes care of me regardless of my imperfections in heart and body.
Before I go on, I have to share a quick God story. The summer before my massive disc rupture and spinal cord injury, a minister asked me to help a woman about my age who had CP requiring a wheelchair. She needed help with running errands, getting evening snack, medications, bedtime routine, etc. I did so without hesitation because I heard God whispering, urging me to lend a hand. She was always very appreciative and called me her gift from God. After my ordeal the following January, I realized that God had not sent me to help her but rather, He had sent her to help me – she was my gift from God. It was my first lesson about the difficulties of living in a wheelchair and I’m always in awe when God allows me to get that glimpse of how He works in our lives when we don’t even know it.
Most of my posts on Wheeling For God (here and on Facebook) reflect the joy and happiness I receive from living my life with Christ at the center of it. It is through Him that even amid a huge storm, my heart can still feel joy and give praise to God. There are days I feel frazzled, in pain, and/or just plain tired, but none of those things matter because my God is big and can help me overcome those times.
So now to the reason for posting this (other than to give praise to God) – a very important concept; everyone is different. God made us all unique and special. Everyone goes through trials on earth and we all react and handle them in various ways. We are all in different places on the path of life. I try to share inspirational posts to help others. If I can make even just one person smile, have relief, happiness, or joy with my words, music and images, then the day was a success.
However, I would want no one to think something is wrong because they don’t feel happiness. Life is full of trials and sometimes the spark just isn’t there, and that’s okay. Keep seeking, keep pushing on because everything on earth happens in God’s timing. He will put the right person in your path, or the right words in your heart and mind as long as you continue to trust in Him. You are His child. Think of how much most earthly fathers love their children. Now think in much larger terms. Our Father in heaven loves us more than any person ever will. He will see us through the good and the bad. But again, in His timing.
You can ask anyone in my family, I am like every other person who has struggles. I too, have those times when I’m crabby, frustrated, rude, teary-eyed, sad and every other emotion known to humanity. As a matter-of-fact, driving is not possible right now, which is a frustration I’m dealing with. I want to able to help my parents as they age, to hop in the van to drive over to see them, or take them to an appointment and errands. But when I get frustrated, I remind myself that my Big God has everything under control. I believe with all my heart, good can come out of all “bad” things if we walk with and glorify God.
If God were to say today, “I will reverse your disability but in doing so, your heart and faith in me will return to what it was 15 years ago.” I would, without hesitation refuse the offer. The struggles I’ve gone through have brought me so close to God that I would never want to lose that. I’d rather “roll” close to my Father than “walk” apart from Him.
So, before I turn this into a novel, I want to remind everyone that if you have Christ in your heart, you can rest your worries with Him because He has it all figured out. Not always easy – I know but when you have those negative feelings about yourself and question your worth – remember that you have value, people care about you, and most importantly, our all-powerful, all-knowing Abba Father in heaven loves you!
My life verse is Philippians 4:13, “I can do all things through Christ Jesus, who strengthens me.” An easy verse to remember when you life seems to fall apart. You can do it with His strength!
All the glory goes to God!
- Wheelchair on beach: princessinthetower.org